I Can Handle It
by iseesparksfly
Summary: Now Ally's over her stage fright and is working towards her own dream, how will Austin feel about it all? One-Shot


**Now Ally's over her stage fright and is working towards her own dream, how will Austin feel about it all?**

**One-Shot**

He'd never been much of an actor.

Sure he did the annual nativity and often starred in Dez's films and projects, but he never really caught the acting bug. To him, acting was trying to be someone you're not, and he automatically connected it with lying. He didn't blame the actors at all, he just wondered why people get such a thrill out of being someone they're not.

Pretending however was a whole different story. Pretending is seeing your life as something a little different. A little more...vibrant. It could be a way of making reality that little bit more exciting. That is if you're pretending for positive reasons. But what if you pretend because you have something to hide?

When he was little it was always the good pretending. Imagining himself as the brave knight, coming to slay the dragon and save the princess. He could be whoever he wanted.

But as he started to grow up he started pretending for different reasons. To please people. To be liked. To fit in. It slowly developed over time. He would wear his hair in a certain style or dress a certain way. It that context he was trying to be something he wasn't.

Pretending, he can do.

* * *

_**Austin's POV**_

My whole life has been seems to be made up of pretending. Not lying. Just acting in a certain way that certain people wanted me to act

Sometimes it would just be little things. Pretending that I didn't mind when Dez ditched me to make a new gingerbread house for Carlos and Benjamin. Or that I didn't mind when time and time again I was dragged into promoting Moon's Mattress Kingdom.

Sometimes it was bigger things. I'd never talk about music in front of the other kids at school because they would laugh. Music was stupid and boring, they would say. And I would agree. To fit in.

But there are certain times, certain people that can stop you from pretending.

* * *

When it came to Ally and I, there wasn't a lot that I could fake.

I never had to hide who I really was with her. She understood me.

Complete opposites, yet she was the only one who really made me feel like myself.

I never had to pretend with her.

Until now.

Because now everything is different.

She's starting her own career.

What does that mean for us?

It's not that I don't want her to perform her own songs. In fact I couldn't be more proud.

I can't, however pretend I'm not worried.

* * *

_**Worried that my career would end. **_

That she'd forget about Team Austin completely. That Team Ally would replace us. Would replace me. She'd be focused on writing her own songs that she wouldn't get a chance to write our songs.

But I can face it. My dream was to become famous and spread my message through music. I had done that. In no shape or form did I want it to be over. But if it was I know it would be alright in the end. Because I have more important things than that to keep.

_I can handle it_

* * *

_**Worried that she wouldn't spend as much time with me.**_

It sounds selfish to think this way but I can't just stop. What with working at sonic boom, teaching music lessons and school, we barely get to hang out already. Those times when we do, it's like I'm addicted. We just talk. Talk about me. Talk about her. School, Trish, Dez, her parents, pancakes. To the untrained ear it may sound like our conversations are meaningless but to us it's different. We're together and that's all we ever needed. Normally our conversations lead nowhere and we just talk about anything and everything, never leading to a specific point. These times would become more and more scarce.

And that's ok because I know she's still there. I'd be ok with not seeing her as often. Every time I see her it would be that little bit more special. Besides we would still see each other, just a little less.

_I can handle it._

* * *

_**Worried she'll be overworked. **_

The thing about Ally is that she will try to do everything at once. Try to make everyone happy before even attempting to think about herself. She'll juggle everything at once at never seem to lose her balance. But maybe this one extra thing, this huge extra thing, will tip the scales and send her tumbling to the floor. Will I be there in time to pick her up? To encourage her? To tell her not to give up?

But I know I will be. Because I'll always be there to catch her. I'd just have to do whatever I could to stop her from falling in the first place.

_I can handle it._

* * *

_**Worried she'd leave.**_

She's talented. Extremely talented. Sooner or later someone is going to spot it. And she won't be my little secret anymore. Everyone will know. She can share her talent with the rest of the world. But what if I don't want to share her with the rest of the world? What if she goes on tours? Moves away? Leaves us all behind?

But everything would be alright because I know she'll be there for me anyway. At the end of the phone. On the computer screen. I'll always have her. We'll just be a little further apart than we used to be.

_I can handle it_

* * *

But worse than my career ending. Worse than her leaving.

_**Worried that she'd forget.**_

That she's going to forget that boy who made a nuisance in her music store. Who she got locked in a freezer with. Who she spent countless nights with, working on songs together sitting closer than was strictly necessary, working together at what they did best.

I could take her being a billion miles away but I couldn't stand her forgetting.

Her forgetting would mean her choosing not to think of us.

I would think of her every morning, every night.

If she forgot, I would know she wasn't doing the same.

_Maybe I can't handle it?_

* * *

I've never had to pretend with Ally before. To me that would be acting.

I've never been much of an actor.

But this time it would be different.

Because I could hide away my worries if I tried.

And I was going to try.

I could handle it.

Because there is no way I am going to stop that girl achieving her dream.


End file.
